I learned this lesson the hard way.
To stop waiting for someone else to save me.
To make my life better.
It was no one else’s job but my own.
But that’s not what I was taught.
I was taught to be a “good girl” and do what I was told.
To grow up and get married and have kids.
And to look to my husband/a man to complete my life.
That I hadn’t succeeded until I had.
So when I got married years ago I had this built in expectation that my marriage would make me complete.
That HE would make ME complete.
But that’s not what happened.
He made my life…
Miserable to be honest!
In fact we made each other’s lives miserable.
Simply put, we were not a good fit.
Like many of us, I had my own work to do.
I had to figure out what my own needs and wants were separate from his.
Separate from what I’d been told they were by my family.
And by society.
I had to learn how to stand on my own two feet.
To have my own back.
To figure out who I was.
And not look to others to tell me who I was.
I had to rescue me.
From my own chronic self-doubts and limiting beliefs.
To believe that I was good enough.
Just as I was.
And to discard the line from the movie Jerry McGuire that I’d been carrying around in my head for years: “you complete me.”
I call B.S.!
No one completes us!
They may compliment or enhance our lives.
But they sure as heck don’t complete us.
Because we were never “incomplete” in the first place.
We’ve always been whole.
We just didn’t know it.
Or weren’t taught it.
So next time you don’t feel good enough.
Or you’re looking for someone else to rescue you or make your life better…
Please do me a huge favour.
Go look in the mirror.
Your savior is looking back at you.
And is ready, willing and able to help you be the person you already are.
That you always were.
For you’ve been there all along.
YOU are the person you’ve been waiting for.