How do you feel about the C word?
And nooooooo, I’m not talking about any of *those* C words!
I’m talking about another one altogether…
The word Choice.
As a life coach it’s an important one for me & for my clients.
Because when you know you have choices, you feel empowered.
The truth of this hit home for me last month.
When I spent four fun-filled days visiting my old friend (& former Toronto roommate & European travel partner) Anne.
We’d had a blast hanging out together in her town.
Talking til the wee hours of the morning. Laughing, hiking, kayaking, walking, & dining out.
Every day was like a fabulous new adventure for me!
On my drive home I realized our time together had checked all the important boxes for me…
Fun, variety, exercise, time outdoors, freedom to be myself, stimulating conversation, & a heart-to-heart connection.
My energy tank was on ‘full.’
I knew I wanted to feel like that more often.
Especially as I approach a big turning point in my life.
My son turns 19 this year. And who knows how much longer he’ll be living at home.
He’s on the cusp of change.
And therefore I’M on the cusp of change, too.
Which got me to thinking…
To stay open.
To explore ALL our choices as we move forward.
Even if some of them might seem crazy at the time.
Because when we shut the door to our imagination before we’ve even opened it, we do ourselves a huge disservice.
We block our creativity.
As well as our own happiness.
And we stay stuck.
In victimhood, fear & powerlessness.
Take for example a former client of mine.
She was in a job she hated.
One that was literally draining the life force out of her.
When we started talking about the various choices she had (to quit, take a leave of absence, look for another job, go part-time, etc) she immediately got defensive & said:
“I can’t do that!”
Each time I gently reminded her to explore all her options (whether she chose any of them or not), she resisted.
And she stayed stuck.
Maybe you can relate?
Maybe you too are resisting all the choices available to you.
When someone offers you an idea of what you ‘could’ do to shift your circumstances, do you get defensive?
Do you say things like: “You don’t understand!”
Or “I can’t do that!”
And then shut them (or yourself) down?
If so, I get it. Change is scary.
However, when you allow yourself the gift of dreaming, you open yourself up to new possibilities.
Ones you never even knew existed.
So next time you’re feeling stuck in life & unable to see a way forward, try these 5 steps…
- Change the words “I can’t!” to: “what if I could?” This opens you up to new perspectives. And shifts your heavy energy to one that’s more open & expansive.
- Brainstorm ALL the crazy, out-there, if-I-had-a-magic-wand-what-
would-I-do ideas. It doesn’t matter if you’ll never do any of them! That’s not the point. The point is to generate ideas. To dream. To let your creative juices flow! ‘Cuz that’s where the best ideas are born. Ones you haven’t even imagined. Yet.
- Choose one idea that feels right for you. And is the most do-able. Let go of wondering ‘how’ it could possibly happen. That’s the Universe’s job to figure out, not yours.
- Take one micro step towards your idea. Keep it simple. Even if it just means doing some research, talking to a supportive friend, or gathering more info. That one baby step will lead you to your next step. And then your next.
- Stay open & curious. See where your micro steps lead you! You might be surprised at just how quickly things can shift. And how much better you feel as they do.
Don’t shut a door before you’ve even opened it!
Explore all the choices before you.
As for me & my next chapter, I’m taking my own advice.
And playing with possibilities.
No holds barred.
Travel? Living abroad?
House-sitting or house-swapping?
Who the freak knows?!
And right now, who cares?
I’m simply allowing myself the time & space to dream.
And to explore the many choices that lie before me.
Which makes me feel excited, alive & hopeful about the future!
‘Cuz isn’t that the whole point?
To feel good? And enjoy life?
I sure as heck think so!
So remember, you always have a choice.
Keep exploring yours & living life to the fullest.
P.S. Still feeling stuck? Need help exploring your choices? Check out my new women’s empowerment course: BACK TO YOU: Rediscover Yourself & Reclaim Your Power (a 5-week online course in living authentically for women over 40). Week 2 is all about exploring!
P.P.S. Interesting in doing 1:1 coaching with me? Click here to set up a free 20 min discovery call.