“I think if I let go, it’s all going to fall apart.”
That’s exactly what my client said to me on our coaching call this week.
She’s been working so darn hard. Trying to take care of everyone else.
Trying to keep it altogether.
And control everything.
But it had taken a toll on her.
She was feeling overwhelmed and resentful.
And very, very tired.
Maybe you can relate?
I know I sure can!
Her words reminded me of a time years ago when my life felt totally out of control.
My son was still a baby. And I was in the middle of divorcing his dad.
Needless to say I was a wreck.
Until I came across the phrase:
‘Let go & trust.’
Those words changed everything for me. They kept me grounded, centered, and sane (!!) during this tumultuous period of my life.
I repeated them every time I dropped my son off with his dad. And drove away crying.
I had to let go of my precious baby. And trust my ex.
Which felt almost impossible at the time.
But I did it. Every damn week.
All the while repeating my mantra…
“Let go and trust, Kerry”
Eventually it DID get easier.
As I learned to release my grip on what I couldn’t control (my ex).
And focus instead on what I could control (me and how I spent my own time).
And even though my son’s all grown up now (and his dad and I have a peaceful co-parenting relationship), my mantra is just as important to me today. As it was back then.
I still repeat it to myself whenever I feel stuck.
In resentment, fear, worry or frustration.
Whenever I find myself ‘gripping’ more tightly to the way I think things should be.
Rather than the way they really are.
“Let go” I’ll quietly say to myself.
Of worry & anxiety.
Of trying to control everything.
And everyone around me.
That others will figure out their own stuff!
(‘Cuz I’m holding them capable.)
That I can handle whatever comes my way.
(‘Cuz I’ve got my own back!)
And that everything will work out in the end.
As it always does.
When I shared these words ‘let go and trust’ with my client this week, they helped her as well.
They reminded her to take charge of what was *hers* to take charge of.
And to hand over the rest…
To others. And to the Universe.
Because we CAN’T do it ALL!
Nor are we meant to.
(It’s kinda self-inflated to think we CAN. Don’t ya think?!)
So, lemme ask you this…
Is there somewhere in your life right now where you’re holding on too tightly?
Where you need to let go? And trust in someone? Or something? More?
I know it’s not easy. Truly I do.
But I encourage you to try.
Here are 3 things that may help you let go of control:
1️. Adopt the mantra “let go and trust” and repeat it to yourself often. Write it on a post-it note or have it as a screensaver on your phone. So you see it every day.
2️. Repeat the words: “I trust they’ll figure it out” each time you catch yourself trying to control someone else, And then go do something else. Give them the time and space they deserve to do just that…figure it out on their own.
3️. Start focusing on the things you can control. The ones that make you feel more confident. And fill you up with joy. Do more of those.
Because just like my client realized, it’s incredibly empowering when you begin to let go and trust.
And put the focus back on YOU.
You’re finally free. And able to move forward in your life with more confidence and joy.
P.S. Need support in letting go and trusting? Check out my course BACK TO YOU: Rediscover Yourself & Reclaim Your Power. It’s for women in midlife who are ready to believe in themselves again and live a life they can call their own.